Day 2775 of the 7 day Bible verse challenge.

Proverbs 3:5 NIV

Lean not on your own understanding. That right there is easily one of it not the biggest challenges in our faith. Completely letting go of this extremely powerful lie that we've bought for so long that has us convinced that we know everything, and that we can handle everything, and that all we'll ever need is ourselves and our strength and our ability and our intellect because those will always be enough to get us where we want to be because they've always been enough to get where we've been.

But don't we see the foolishness in that? Is where we've been all that great? Is what we've accomplished on our own really anything to brag about? Have we ever actually accomplished anything all on our own without a hint of outside assistance or a shred of what most might call ‘luck’? Have we ever really managed to find our own way to this ideal life that we've always wanted, the life that we thought would bring us all the happiness and joy and satisfaction that we've always wanted to find?

Or have we actually just followed our own deceitful hearts into an illusionary existence that’s only filled with a million lies that rely on one another to keep us distracted from seeing the problems by convincing us that they're not there?

You see, we just can't stomach the idea that we've gotten this all wrong. We can't wrap our minds around the possibility that we've made mistakes and taken the wrong path that can never actually lead to anything good or lasting. We can't seem to accept the truth that we've been wayward since birth and have only managed to dig our pits deeper and deeper as we've grown older. We can’t see past these lies that tell us that we’ve done nothing wrong in living for ourselves and that chasing our plans has not only given us freedom, but that it’s actually worked out perfectly.

But then we look at the cross.

That cross tells us a story that doesn't coincide with our delusions. It tells us that there is pain and misery and suffering and punishment and even death that will be found and felt in this world. It reminds us that someone died, and that miserable death was endured for a reason that conflicts violently with our selfish inability to reconcile our mistakes with this lie that has given us solace through our version of 'understanding'. The cross stands in the middle of the road telling us that our way only leads to one thing, and it’s not at all what we ever hoped to find.

That's the whole point of complete surrender. It's realizing that our version of anything is at most only second-best and in all reality completely worthless. That's why we see this message so frequently in Scripture. We're called again and again to lay down our lives, to stop leaning on ourselves, to admit that we've royally messed up everything and are in dire need of wisdom that we simply have never managed to find doing this all on our own. We’re told all these stories of people who went wildly against what was considered wise, and intelligent, and understandable according to humanity’s weak grasp of understanding.

Like one of my college professors always said, "If I say it more than once it's probably something you should remember."

Time and time again, Scripture reminds of the value of humility. It's in the stories like the Prodigal Son, the journey of Jonah, the willingness of Abraham, the trust of Noah, and the 180 seen in turning Saul into Paul. It's one of the most pervasive messages and lessons in the Bible because it's one of the most crucial aspects of actually living our lives by faith in something or someone other than ourselves.

We have to lay down our lives, lay down our pride, lay down our plans, let go of everything we think we know and simply let God lead us to something vastly different. And that’s because as long as we keep holding onto this mindset that tells us we can find something at least decent doing this our way, we’ll never have hearts fully set on following Christ. We can’t, or at least won’t, follow anyone else so long as we remained convinced that we still know the way.

And letting go of that lie is excruciatingly difficult for the minds of an arrogant creation who's long found confidence thinking that everything he or she has done is completely without error or consequence. It’s hard for us to see past these lies that we think are still true. It’s hard to accept God’s truth when the fallacy of our own logic seems so much easier and more sensible. It's hard for us stop leaning on ourselves because that's the only way we've ever known to do this.

But like I asked up top, is what we've done trying this our way really anything in which we've found pride, or happiness, or satisfaction, or hope, or peace, or anything at all that has lasted more than a moment? No. All we’ve found is nothingness, and while we want better than that, we also still love this idea that we will find it at some point down this road that we think can still work.

"With all your heart." You see, we simply can't hold anything back in this journey of faith that demands we learn to trust in God and surrender all we've known and all we've been and all we've done to Him. We can't reserve anything just in case He falls to deliver on this incredible promise that He offers us. We can't go into this assuming that what we'll find isn't worth what we have to give up to receive it. We can't approach a life of faith still clinging tightly to our old lives because it's simply not logical to be both something new yet what we've always been at the same time.

And I think that's the key to unlocking this surrender. It's found in realizing that we've honestly never found anything worth finding outside of God. That's where we found the willingness to open our hearts to Christ to begin with! It's not because we were simply bored and wanted to try something new and exciting. It's because we finally realized that all we've ever found following our hearts and our understanding is a life of emptiness and broken dreams and shattered hopes and a mountain of shame and guilt and remorse that's more painful than we ever allowed ourselves to realize before.

We didn't open the Bible for the first time because we ran out of other books to read. We didn't swallow our pride and take a seat in a church pew because we just felt like getting up early on Sunday and no other place was open yet. We didn't hit our knees and send up a prayer because it was all the rage. We did it because we wanted something better than the lies we'd spent our entire lives chasing. We wanted change, and we knew that we couldn't make this kind of change all by ourselves.

Friends, that’s the whole point: We never have to. We never have to wear ourselves out trying to make a life only to find a lie. We don't have to waste our time trying to understand everything so that we can retain this hollow sense of control that keeps us convinced we can make our own destiny. We don’t have to fix ourselves or create these perfect lives or free ourselves from sin and selfishness so that God might like us more and therefore have more pity on us. We have the chance to lay it all down, stop trying to fit all these broken pieces together, and simply let God take over and do what only He can do which is all that will ever lead us to anything good.

This journey of faith is one of constant surprises. Being surprised at how little we know and how much we have to learn. Being surprised at how much of this world still exists in our hearts. Being surprised at how strange His path is and how little sense it makes. Being surprised when we start finding excitement in change and the opportunity it offers. Being surprised that He can somehow love us after all the stupid things we've done that have led us so far from Him all these years.

Leaning on our own understanding will make this journey impossible. Because let's be honest, what human would choose a life of humility? Who would choose a path of self-control in a world of sinful freedom and selfish indulgence? Who would choose to admit their guilt when that's not something this world ever really acknowledges let along considers? Who would choose to be willing to die to self and take up their cross and follow someone else into the desert where everything is stripped away leaving them only a hope in a promise that they've only heard about?

There's nothing about our faith that's logical to our worldly minds. It's all foolish. It's crazy. It's insane. It's completely contrary to everything our understanding can comprehend. And yet, when you start to look at it without all the preconceived notions and without this stance of knowing everything, you actually find that it makes a whole lot more sense than the lives we've been living.

In all honesty, our idea of understanding is pretty flimsy. We can find ways to make just about anything make sense. After all, each of us have done things that seemed like the right thing to do at the time only to be racked with guilt for years afterward. So maybe our understanding isn't what we should be listening to after all. Maybe we should get ourselves out of the way and see what God can do when He doesn't have to contend with us trying to offer Him our suggestions.

Until we give God everything, His path simply won't make sense. But when we do, we'll finally realize that His path is the only one that actually leads to something that lasts because it goes in the opposite direction of where we'd choose to go. Like it or not, we're pretty dumb. Sure, it's hurts a little to admit that, but friends, admitting that fact is the first step down a path that, while narrow, leads to life.

This road may not make much sense at times along the way. But hey, if it makes sense to us then it doesn't require us to lean on God. And if we're not leaning on Him, then we're probably doing something wrong!

#LeaveNoSoulUntold